Character Interview #1

Character Interview #1

• Wednesday, September 1, 2021

Character Interview #1: A Short Story by Malunky

“Good day! … Well, you might be reading this at night. Aha! Good 24 hour time span readers! Upon request from the editor, I am doing this interview with one of my favorite characters. I chuckle to add, he is a real one….

“He is a rather persnickety fellow, and I have heard a verifiable account that he has been spotted robbing… ah… Fort Knox was it?

"The interviewee says, “It was not Fort Knox

“Well, any hoodle, he is known by all as Miserly Babushka along with various other names including one of which only I know…. Alright, alright, since I am being pressed so hard, I will tell you that his given name is S….

"The interrogated one rudely interrupts, 'Mr. Narrator…'

"(Ooh, with the way he said MR. Narrator, he must be a real gentleman.)

“Miserly says, “There is no way that you can break my trust by telling them that my name is Sandy Beach. !!!. It is incredibly hard when YOU…

"(I like how he said YOU.)

"He says, “When You control every word I say. Actually, I refuse to speak anymore.”

“This ought to be good, he is twiddling his thumbs in his chair. If there were thumb twiddling competitions, I’m sure he would win, my, look at those thumbs FLY! His hands drop to his side and he stands like a private at attention. He has a great chiseled form, but alas, his thumb is out of position and thus ruins his Olympic beauty. He gets up to go, but alack, he finds the door is locked. He pulls out a lock pick (I wonder why he carries one of those around?) He looks at it with a puzzled glance as if wondering how it got there (short answer, I put it there). He puts it to use and tries at the door. His clumsy hands drop it, and as he bends down, he kicks it and it falls down an air vent to the center of the earth (The vent is for heating of course).

“Oh my, I fear I am running out of time, and must conclude with this small man staring into the vent while sobbing uncontrollably. “He speaks (rather I speak through him with my pen) “A moment ago you said I had an Olympic form, but now you say i’m small?” “Of course, I could make you poof into a pink unicorn squirrel, he asks, “Why?”

"Because I am the NARRATOR … that’s why."