This Bothers me: Introvert Edition. Our generation has witnessed the rise of a seemingly harmless trend. One that has always bothered me, but I never really thought about why.
Introverts, and extroverts.
If you’re the type of person who enjoys social experiments, you can ask anybody under the age of forty, and most, if not all of them will tell you that they are one of these two things.
This form of categorization has become the norm. Everywhere you turn, you see personality tests, stereotypes, memes, fun facts, trivia, etc. “Are you an introvert?” “10 signs that you are an extrovert.” “What introverts are really thinking.” “Extroverts be like.” And on and on and on. There’s no denying that this has become a big deal.
But it’s all in good fun, right? Isn’t it important to know your personality type? What’s the harm in it?
I don’t think that-- in and of itself-- taking a personality test is harmful. I’ve taken a few myself. They’re interesting, maybe even entertaining, but the problem arises when you start to give it importance that it does not have.
Say you’re one of those people who is not comfortable in social settings. You don’t really want to talk to people, you’d rather just listen. You don’t like being the center of attention, and after a while, you get tired of people and want to go home. Does this mean that you are an Introvert? Yeah sure. Is that important? Not even a little bit.
There is a simple principle that applies to this. When you put yourself in a box, when you take all of your complex, unique self and stuff it into a generic category, it becomes all too easy to treat your personality like a condition.
A person could say, “I shouldn’t go to this party because I have cancer, and it would be too exhausting.” Nobody would argue the validity of that reasoning. Or a person could say, “I shouldn’t go to this party because I’m an introvert, and it would be too emotionally draining.” And by today’s standards, that would be an equally valid reason. Do you begin to see the problem?
Your personality is not a disease. It is a gift from God, custom made just for you. And by God’s grace, whatever challenges that come with it are not insurmountable. It is not something to be exploited at your pleasure.
And yes, it is a challenge. One that I face myself, honestly. I’ve been told time and time again that I’m an introvert. I never bought it, because I can be as social as the occasion calls for without breaking a sweat. A lot of times I don’t feel like it. I often want to curl up in the corner and shut everything out. But I don’t. I suck it up and do what needs done because that’s what life is about.
Most people, at some point, will need to decompress, and some people do that best alone. Jesus Himself often retired to the wilderness to get away from the crowds and pray. It is a beneficial, and sometimes necessary practice.
Having those feelings isn’t wrong. Letting those feelings define you, and control you, and influence your decisions is wrong.
Now, let’s say that, for whatever reason, you are listing ten random things about yourself. Should, “I am an introvert/extrovert”, be on that list? No. The entire concept is a worldly, cultural construct that has zero relevance to, or bearing on, how you live your life. It should never, ever become your identity. And it should never be used as an excuse.
“But studies have shown that when an introvert tries to be extroverted it can mentally damaging…”
Well, why are those your options? You don’t have to be one or the other. Just be a competent adult. Do what the situation calls for. Take responsibility for your actions. And don’t let your fears, or personal tics, or social preferences get in the way of your life.
There are going to be times when you’re being pressured to hang out with your friends or go to a party, or some such nonsense, and you’re not going to want to. When this happens, all you have to do is say, “I don’t want to.” You don’t have to blame it on your self-imposed problems.
Fact is, the whole premise is faulty. I’ve heard accounts of people who used to be introverts and are now extroverts, or vice versa. The mere fact that you can change it on a whim indicates that you made it up in the first place.
The most exceptional people are the ones who see a problem for what it is, and, rather than use it as an excuse to be irresponsible, endeavor to solve it.
Challenges are not there to make us insecure. They are there to teach us, to make us stronger, to help us grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ (2 Peter 3:18).
As far as problems go, I wouldn’t say this one takes the cake, but it certainly isn’t treated as it should be. With suspicion. The Church should always be suspicious of the wildly popular. As a general rule. Because, if the World is all for it, it’s hardly going to be beneficial to the Church. This is what history shows us.
Aug/30/2021
AJ. Hann
